Christmas

Sparkles, ribbon and twinkling lights 

Tinsel, baubles and children's delight 

Carols, movies, and wrapping up treats

Boardgames, turkey and plenty of sweets

Giving presents to show that we care

Slippers, smellies and socks by the pair!

Baby Jesus the king in the hay

Born just to save us, our debt to pay

Thank you Father for sending this joy

Giving Christmas through Christ as a boy

Although it may pass ever so swift

Pause to rejoice at loves selfless gift

Things are not as they seem...

What do you say in the face of despair?

How do you mend what no man can repair?

When hope is lost and you can't dare to dream

When you don't even have any strength left to scream.

When your chest feels so tight it hurts just to breathe

And you're not really sure what to believe

When no matter who's near, you feel so alone

And the path that's ahead is completely unknown

There is a man who knows just how you feel

His life marked with death, His sacrifice real

Rejected, condemned, His turmoil clear

He cried out in pain and sweat blood in His fear

However it seemed in the depths of despair

The truth is His death was our answer to prayer

With trust through His trial, His heart full of love

He's made us a way to our father above

Now our saviour is radiant, His arms open wide

His path to win freedom can serve as a guide

No matter how desperate things may appear

God won't be defeated - your victory is near

 

Seek and you will find

Reaching out for you

Calling out your name

Knowing when I find you

I'll never be the same

Watching for a sign

Dreaming in my heart

Trusting when I reach you

A new adventure starts

Finding it's not I

Seeking after you

Hearing that you chose me 

No matter what I do

Waiting for a word

Feeling heavens rain

Wanting to touch your hem

And be renewed again

Breathing in your love

Freeing captive souls

Flowing in your power

I know you've made me whole

The Answer

Well as usual I'm not sure it's 100% finished but here it is;

Why can't I seem to get it right?

Why do I always have to fight?

Why do I doubt that I am free?

Why did you choose to die for me?

Without you here my heart is stone

Without you here I have no home

Without you here my hope is lost

Without you here it's just a cross

When will I live life as I should?

When will I feel my heart is good?

When will I know my soul is saved?

When will I see the empty grave?

Then all at once my king appears

Then all at once he dries my tears

Then all at once I feel his praise

Then all at once my hands are raised.

He said 'why don't you see it's done?'

He said 'my child your war is won.'

He's said 'there's something you must know'

He said 'I made you white as snow'

So I will sing to lift your name 

So I will live to spread your fame

So I will dance my hope renewed

So I will place my life in you

Happy Birthday Mum

It's been a short while but I've written a few poems. This one's a bit rough around the rhythm edges but if it was good enough for mum it'll have to be good enough for everyone else!

Mum you are amazing 

And it's easy to see 

I was really blessed 

That God gave you to me 

We were not ever rich

And sometimes life was sad

But I am still thankful 

For all the times we had

I smile when I think of

Story books at night

And the door ajar

To see the hallway light

The picnics in the park

And daily walks to school

The special birthday treats

And playing at the pool

I'd watch you do makeup

And loved when you let me

Pretend to paint your face

As I sat on your knee

Now I have a baby

I'm even more aware

How hard it must have been

When sad to show you cared

I hope this poems not

A Helen Steiner Rice*

I just wanted to say

I think you're rather nice :)

*no disrespect to Helen may she rest in peace.

Grace

Waiting when I should be moving

Or moving when I should be still

Talking when I should be listening 

But trying to do your will

Within me there is a longing 

To be all you called me to be

Everything I am is striving 

I fear I'll never be free

Desperate, feeble and hiding 

I long to obey but I sin

Grateful your strength's overcoming

All of the weakness within

Perfect grace is completing 

The work you began in my heart

Regardless of all my failings

You chose me right from the start

Light

As darkness descends on the face of the land

You can sweep it aside with one wave of your hand

But instead it lingers as if to stay

And I wonder why you won't brush it away

I want to escape, to turn and to flee

But here you are and so here I will be

I call on your name and ask you to come 

And you awaken my heart in the light of the Son

I look all around thankful to see

The source is now dwelling inside of me

I know I won't be afraid in the night 

Darkness can't live in the face of the light

The Broken Vase

A jug so fair, of finest china

Full of hope and full of plans

A vessel beautiful and settled 

But not quite placed within His hands

Then one sad day the vase is fractured

Broken, cracked and deep in pain

Perhaps myself I can repair it?

Alas all efforts are in vain.

Then falls direct a flood from heaven

The lost jug could not contain

And somehow now through pain and sorrow 

Gods love can flow, released again

Without the cracks the jugs full purpose 

Could not fully be achieved

Although it feels it is now useless

It should not ever be deceived.

As He flows through you he transforms you

Healing with the purest gold

And the new pot He's creating

Is something different than the old

A vessel of outstanding beauty

Surpassed only by its grace

Through which Gods love can flow freely

As it's restored and set in place

This poem isn't perfect, but that's the point-we don't have to be perfect to be used!

Hold On

This poem and The Broken Vase were words for a special friend. Just sharing as I'm sure they are for lots of people; 

How long must I wait

How long can I stand 

How long do I trust

With my life in your hands

How dark will it get

How dark around me

How dark the shadow

Of sickness that I see

 

How lost can I feel

How lost are my dreams

How lost is my hope

And how ripped at the seams

How real my sorrow

How real the deep pain

How real is the fear

When will life start again...

Hold on my daughter

Hold on to my love

Hold on so tightly

To your father above

Trust in my promise

Trust in deep grace

Trust in my mercies

Look me full in the face

Keep on in worship

Keep on being stirred

Keep on believing

I am true to my word

I have died for you

I have set you apart

I have your future

I need only your heart

Perspective

God gave me this for someone. Maybe it's for you too.

You see dirt

I see diamonds

I see roses

You see thorns

You were naked

I have clothed you

I am mending

Where you're torn

All your tears 

I've collected

All your worries 

I'll allay

In your darkness

I will guide you

If beside me

You will stay

You see sickness

I see healing

I see joy

Where you feel pain

You can stand

On my promise 

In my love

You'll rise again

The Wall

I'm not sure I like this one, but it's written so I'm sharing it!

I see the wall before my eyes 

My soul despairs and my heart cries 

It's so immense I want to run, 

‘Til my legs fail and my chest burns 

Or slump slowly down its cold stones, defeated

But something deep inside me stirs 

A quiet voice that gently spurs 

Me on to fight, to see the world, 

Beyond the fear, the griping cold 

But then the lies rise up again, repeated

The wall's so high, so wide so vast

I've not succeeded in the past 

I can’t believe I can be free 

Darkness is closing in on me 

And yet the whispering voice will not be silenced

Just push one stone the voice suggests

Just try and I will do the rest

And so trembling, weak and tired, 

I shove without the strength required 

To move it but it moves and I'm elated

I can see a glimpse through the gap

Of fear removed and with a clap 

I dare to hope that I can stand 

And walk in peace through son drenched land 

A future in which satans plans negated

If I can just create a space

That I can crawl through on my face

I can get to the other side 

And then up to my feet I'll rise 

And dance, sing and live where my God intended

So with hope, I push the next stone 

Eager to explore my new home 

I lean and strain with all my might 

I really give it all my fight 

But nothing shifts, still trapped I cry, dejected

That voice within me starts to say 

'Don’t try alone, that's not the way 

I planned for you, you're not to crawl 

I'm going to help you beat the wall' 

So I follow my masters lead; corrected

He points to each stone I must tackle, 

Each one a trial, a fierce battle 

And slowly, surely I start to see 

The whole wall weaken in front of me 

Then I step back to praise and cheer 

As down does tumble all my fear 

As I walk forward the pain beneath 

My feet, and breathe a sigh of relief

I feel the strength I've built and smile, my life’s redeemed!

Marriage - it's a bit tough!

I've realised this week how delicate even the strongest marriage is and how strong the most delicate. Like a spiders web. 

I wrote this poem. I'm not sure it's finished, but it is for now;

Marriage isn't easy, but was it meant to be?

It's a lesson in surrender, in letting go of me

It's a call to forgiveness each and every day

Remembering that Jesus requires us to live this way

It teaches us that love is more than how we feel

It's something that we live and breathe and walk to make it real

When we both take our vows and choose to say 'I do'

We're really promising God that we'll be faithful and true

In faithfulness is beauty, it's denying self

And the trust you build between you is worth much more than wealth

Marriage isn't easy but it's worth all the pain

When you give yourself to someone you'll never be the same

I AM

I AM (Based on Job 38)

Where were you when I created the foundations of the earth?
Were you there when I laid out its depth and height and girth?
Did you hear stars sing as I set the cornerstone in place?
Or see the angels shout out as they gazed upon His face?
 
Are you aware it is I who sets the boundaries of the sea?
My voice declares ‘this far and no farther will you be’
Can you speak and paint a sunrise brilliant and bright?
Or can you call forth dawn and strip evil from the night?
 
Have you explored the deepest sea or seen the gates of death?
Can you guide the light and dark with just a single breath?
Do you know where I hide the wind; or keep hail and snow store?
They are the weapons fit for battle I prepared for times of war
 
Who points each beam of lightning and decides a path for rain?
Who can quench each blade of grass and each parched desert plane?
Do you create the delicate frost, as intricate as lace?
Or with wisdom count the clouds and set the stars in space?
 
Can Pleiades chains you bind or Orion's cords untwine?
Or govern all the earth and the laws of heaven define?
Do you give insight to the heart; or do the mind you guide?
Or have you witnessed the lioness feed as you provide?
 
I tell you of my wonderful deeds, not to show you’re small
But to witness to your spirit that I am Lord of all
So when you start to question and I don't tell you my plan
Just look at my creation and remember that I AM.
 

A special shout out to Matt Stubbs (Mubbs from here on) for help with this and many other things.

Enough

When troubles come and faith is weak
When I feel lost your face I seek
 
When pain so deep consumes my soul
I know your love can make me whole
 
When my tears begin to drown me
Then your peace it will surround me
 
When my hope ends and winters long
You call the spring and sing my song
 
When I feel faint all strength is lost
You carry me, you've paid the cost
 
Although sometimes the road is rough
My life's in you and that's enough

Fear and Faith

Fear is corrosive, it eats me up inside
It darkens the light moments 
And makes me want to hide

But the trick to notice, as I hide away
Is the fear gets bigger
If I don't stand and say;

I won't be overtaken - a promise from my king
I just have to trust Him
And so I'll always sing;

Thank you precious Jesus, for never leaving me
Thank you for my victory
You died to set me free

Thank you I won't forever, live in this tiresome place
Because you rose to save me
Because I'll see your face

So although things may seem dark now, and the journey long
I'll trust my awesome saviour
To be my hope, my joy, my song.